Say What’s On Your Mind

April.29.2008 at 12:01 pm 2 comments

“At the end of the day, the best thing to do for your friends is to be honest ….. You just have to hope that your honesty doesn’t make them realize something they didn’t want to know.”

– J.D.

If you haven’t seen Scrubs yet … it’s one hilarious show to watch. I’ve recently been watching reruns on Comedy Central (but not the new ones on NBC yet) and I love hearing the narrations from J.D. … they’re quite insightful when you really think about them.

I’m the type of person who reflects on life, my own and other people’s. It’s just me, so i cannot fight it nor change that about me.

Anyways, the above quote got me thinking about honesty with the people in my life, whether it be with co-workers, close friends, and even family. People always say, “Honesty is the best policy”, but how true is that?

I’ll admit … the truth hurts … it hurts your ego, it hurts your emotions, it hurts your relationship with friends. But in the end, you can only hope that it’ll make you a stronger person.

You never how the other person will react when they hear it. Granted some may already know, but it might be awkward to hear it aloud for the first time or even from someone close to them.

I’m usually honest with people and hope they’re the same with me. Granted I can be quite frank when the time comes. An example was with my friend Nat, long story short … she blew me off a couple of times when we were suppose to get together and that got me upset.

When I saw her finally I was honest with the way I felt. Granted I could have kept it to myself, been fake and made it seem like it was all right, and go our merry way. She’s a close friend and to be fake with her would be unfair to both of us.

I remember telling this story to a friend of mine and he seemed surprised that I was honest with her. In my head I was thinking, “Well yeah, what was I suppose to do? Say nothing and pretend that she didn’t blow me off?”. Eventually she apologized and both of us said our peace.

Another prime example was letting a guy I knew, Ryan, that I liked him. I feel it was one of the biggest mistakes that I made. Like the quote above, I think it was something that he didn’t want to know.

It was really awkward afterwards between us and it hurt … I’m not going to pretend it didn’t … but it did. I remember a buddy of mine telling me to stop bitching about him and move on.

I was quite surprised that he had the balls to say that to me because he’s not usually the type of person to be honest with you up front.

Honesty, it’s like a double edge sword. I know it hurts, but I’d rather have honesty from people then having them lie to me, and one thing I cannot stand is when people lie to me.

One of many pet peeves, and people in my life know this about me. *Smirks*

So at the end of the day, is the best thing to do for your friends is to be honest with them? I say yes, it may hurt, but I’d rather hear it from a friend than a complete stranger off the street.

– A

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Entry filed under: General, Life, Personal, Thoughts.

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2 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Awake In Rochester  |  April.30.2008 at 10:25 pm

    I’m not the best when it comes to confronting. There are a few tactics that I’ve learned when it comes to honesty. “A spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down.” In other words say a complement, or something positive about the person before you make your criticism. I’ve heard a boss say that during a review she says 3 nice things about the person before she hits that one bad thing. It helps to soften the blow.

    Some people are great at giving very gentle constructive criticism. I wish I were one of them…Still leaning.

    Reply
  • 2. - A  |  April.30.2008 at 10:33 pm

    I hate confrontations too, but sometimes I just want to get things off my chest without worrying about what the other person thinks. Especially if they’re a really close friend of mine.

    It’s difficult when you know that person. I’ll join the club with you … still learning too.

    Reply

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About Me

The short version: Guy in his late-20's, loves technology (especially Apple) and his close friends, eating ice cream on his bright yellow couch and finally .. I'm gay.

But you can read the long version HERE

Quotes Of The Day

- "In the end, every relationship needs maintenance …Whether it’s the smallest gesture …or just picking up back where you left off. The bottom line is that if you care about someone, it’s pretty easy to make the sacrifice."

- J.D. (From Scrubs)

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